I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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