i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
should my penis look like a turkey
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
