Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
