Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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