...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
