I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
