Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I love having hate sex.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
