He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
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