4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Randomize
