Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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