i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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