I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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