can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
babies were throwing up all over the place
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
