Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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