i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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