bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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