You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
