I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
