I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
