Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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