How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
