my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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