My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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