wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize