Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
