bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
