THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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