I only kidnapped one of them. chill
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
