This is not my ceiling
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
