with your own penis?
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
