Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
