no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
