Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
