I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
