I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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