Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
