yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
