I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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