Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
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