You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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