See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
