I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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