he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
