There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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