sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
