did you get engaged???
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
