I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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