I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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