i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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