found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
